Saturday, 28 June 2008

A bit slapped out

That’s how I’m feeling right now. I’ve railed against the Post Office, the Pension Service, incompetent employees, arrogant and stupid sales assistants, unruly children, etc. etc. and I find myself without anyone to slap. Not that there aren’t things that are irritating me at the moment, but they’re a bit too personal to blog about.

So...I am opening these pages to you, dear readers. For a few days.

Be my guests – slap away!

Play nice, though. I can’t edit comments: if yours is too rude, inflammatory or libellous, I won’t be able to publish it at all.


  1. After saying I didn't have anything to grumble about... I've just heard on the news that some cyclist association has requested changes to the Highway Code so they can be safer on the roads. One of their suggestions is that there should be a special green light for them at pedestrian crossings. Like they need to be told when they can zoom through traffic lights!!! I can't remember the number of times I've nearly been run over by a cyclist believing traffic lights had nothing to do with them. Slap!

  2. I will chime in merrily and slap the Post Office myself! It must be the same everywhere now - everyone is a terrorist unless proven otherwise. I made the mistake of NOT lying about what was in a package - so because it contained ONE 1/32 oz. perfume sample, they charged me quite a bit more, said it could not go by air, and made me write the HAZMAT code for it on the package, which they produced from a gigantic manual of such things. They treated me as though I were trying to mail an open vial of Ebola virus. Next time I am going to calculate my own postage and just drop it in a box. Slap slap slap!

  3. Aaaargh, I've been tagged! LOL! OK, Brian, I will think about it. :-)

    Welcome to my blog, Flora. You should always lie to the PO when sending perfume. 'Used cosmetics' is my preferred option. I know others sometimes say 'snow globe' if there's an audible gloop glooping coming from the package.

    Better safe than sorry, I suppose, eh?

  4. I want to SLAP people who adopt pets when they can't even pay their own bills, and then freak out when the pets get sick and they can't afford to take them to the vet. GRRRR!

    Oh, and definitely lie about the contents of your package! If there's any sloshing, I tell them it's flavored vinegar :~D

  5. I would like to slap people who, when they've made a big mistake at work that causes you extra work to undo, tell you at once, grinning, that everyone makes mistakes and it wasn't that important anyway and that you should really learn to chill. Especially when their mistake came from not caring or thinking much.

    Slap to all those who are always so easy on themselves. Must be nice.

  6. Hi Bela, Can you please give a slap to banks who refuse to let customers know when their cash machines aren't work.
    I was in the local shopping centre branch of a habitual bank now owned by an organisation in a newly-crowned football championship-winning country. I tried one machine, it didn't work. I tried the other - it didn't work. I then joined a burgeoning cue for an assistant and watched other poor souls waste their time too.
    When I got up to one of the counters I asked why they weren't putting signs up to warn people. I was told that they were all too busy serving customers. My offer to do it for them was declined.

  7. Slapping my self for being too busy and too lazy and did not find the time to jump over to London and grant my wonderful cousin the hug she deserve.


  8. I need to slap myself. My poor cat has died. We tried experimental surgery, and many procedures which might have helped. He had a very good night last Wednesday. I visited him at the vet, and we spent an hour together, with him being unbelievably affectionate and funny. One of the vet assistants started to cry, and I should have realized his time was near. I didn't, and we spent the next few days together. The night before he died I arranged a banquet of his favorite things, and he plowed through about 200 g of cold shrimp plus some rare beef and assorted cat treats. He went for a walk on Saturday morning, and when he returned I knew that he was beyond any help.

    I'm slapping myself for not realising how little time he had left, and for leaving him at the vet for a few days. He could have been home, rolling in his cat nip garden! I miss him a lot.


    Carole MacLeod

  9. T, I couldn’t agree more. I don’t understand how some people take on animals and behave as if they were objects they can do what they please with and dispose of when they don’t suit them any longer (luckily, there are also people like Carole, below). But then some people have masses of children they can’t afford to support either.

    L, those kinds of people are always so ‘enchanted’ by what they do, aren't they? They find themselves so charming and expect others to do too. Someone should tell them there is nothing charming about being a selfish idiot.

    LH, I’ve given up where banks are concerned. The cash machines at my local branch of the Abbey were out of order for several weeks last year. Did they give a d*amn?

    E, it’s perhaps just as well you couldn’t come over when you said you might. Not to worry: we will meet again very soon, I’m sure. :-)

    Oh, I’m so sorry, C. I know exactly how you’re feeling right now. I’m certain you did your absolute best for your poor, sweet pussycat. You couldn’t have known. Take care of yourself. (((((Carole)))))

  10. (((Carole))) I have been there, feeling angry at myself for not realizing (or, in my case, being in denial about) how badly a furry friend was doing. Please don't be too hard on yourself, and take comfort in the knowledge that you were able to give him a *truly* wonderful last night.

  11. Thank you both, bela and trina, for your kind words. Officer was a wonderful cat, eho has me socialized to become a decent owner for another cat, parhaps in a few months time.



  12. I'd like to administer a good slapping to anyone who mentions X*** before Guy Fawkes.

    Yesterday's post contained a mini catalogue from the RSPB, inviting me to buy X*** cards.
    In July!?

    Erm - suppose I should get a slap too, now that I've brought up the topic.


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