Friday, 28 July 2006

Tête à claques XII

The heat wave is apparently over. Phew! I couldn’t stand it! No, not the heat – the moaning, the whingeing, the grumbling, the millions of newspaper articles with dire warnings about heat strokes and other various illnesses caused by the hot weather.

I know a 76-year-old woman, in good health, who lives in a lovely, airy house, with a gorgeous garden, and who, after reading all those doom-laden articles, was convinced she wouldn’t survive – like those very frail old people who were left alone in deserted French towns a couple of years ago and who died because no one thought of checking up on them.

I had heat stroke once, years ago – in Israel, in the middle of August. I was staying with Polish relatives of my mother’s who had recently arrived in the country, complete with goose-down mattresses, duvets and pillows. I was sleeping in a kind of meringue during the night and being fed incredibly stodgy food during the day. I collapsed. I was put to bed sans duvet, and given sweet and salty drinks. All I had was a slight fever and a headache. I didn’t die.

Who’d have thought the Brits were such wimps?! There won’t be any more complaining, I hope. I’d be very glad not to see such a lot of yucky white flesh on show as well. Not a chance of that, though, the Brits strip down to their knickers as soon as the sun comes out for a second. Ugh!

They never stop talking about the weather, yet they’re always taken by surprise by it. The whole of the UK comes to a standstill whenever the place isn’t grey and chilly. We’ve just had ‘the wrong kind of heat’, very soon – too soon for my taste – it’ll be ‘the wrong kind of snow’ again.

Slap!

8 comments:

  1. Seattleites must go to British "I can't handle the weather" school. We just whined our way through our heatwave (it hit 98 one day!) ... and give us a few months, we'll be battening down the hatches for our customary inch-and-a-half of snow (are the schools closed!? is the freeway shut down!? will there be enough potable water!?). Honestly. xoxo

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  2. I accept the slap grudgingly. Can I share it with all the others who whined for sun and then whined for un-sun. No helping people like me!

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  3. Quick, let's make a cup of tea. That'll make it better.

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  4. Do Seattle trains stop running because of 'leaves on the tracks' in the autumn, M? Ours do. LOL!

    JvS, how did the Brits ever manage to colonize half the world, I wonder.

    Tea is indeed very refreshing - in any circumstance, L. :-)

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  5. Having suffered from a very bad case of heatstroke,(complete with a trip to the hospital) I'm on the side of the whiners :P ;-) I agree with LuLu on the tea. Tea can fix almost Anything. This is um...a well known medical Fact..at least in my family) ;-)

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  6. Poor Tinkerbell! I am aware excessive heat can be quite dangerous but the way the newspapers were going on about it you'd have thought we were all in mortal danger. Come on! LOL!

    Tea and chicken soup... best cure-alls ever.

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  7. it's not so much the british people it's our workplaces and buildings which with their parsimonious ethics of oh it doesn't get hot or cold that often so we wont bother with air con or prepare for the sugar dusting of snow that falls once in a blue moon that induces the whingeing

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  8. Bostonians suffer from the "I can't handle the weather" syndrome too. After reading this, I am going to try my damndest not to talk about the weather for a week. We'll see how many people I have to ignore!

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