Friday, 12 August 2005

Things should be more considerate

I live in a minute flat.

It’s a studio and the main room is 13 feet and a bit by 11 feet and a bit. I have a bed and a chest of drawers, a large table that serves as a desk, with a large computer, a printer, two great big dictionaries, pens and papers, a filing tray, a clock, and stuff. I also have masses of books and smaller chest of drawers full of documents. And paintings and pictures, although I’ve kept one of the walls completely bare: I read somewhere, years ago, that it made a room look larger. Hmm… I don’t know, but it’s quite possible the room would feel even smaller if all four walls were somehow defined by pictures.

I also have a kitchen the size of a… kitchen cabinet; a bathroom that’s too big in comparison with everything else, and a narrow corridor that I couldn’t do without, since it contains half of my books, some of my clothes, boxes of stuff I shouldn’t be keeping, the cat’s litter tray, and a folding bicycle that’s never folded.

I was never meant to end up in that studio: it used to belong to my partner, but I sold the small flat I had in Notting Hill Gate just before they started shooting that film and then the big flat I bought in Shepherd’s Bush turned out to be … actually, you don’t want to know. It’s a really boring story.


Today, I would like to slap my flat. For being so tiny. For not being expandable (I don’t see why not). For not being up to the job of accommodating me, the cat and my belongings. I'm always very nice to my flat, but it's not that nice to me, and I resent it.

12 comments:

  1. I saw this program how in Japan each room serves several purposes, I can't imagine because they were all very tiny rooms yet they somehow manage. Anytime I clean, I imagine throwing everything out and living as a minimalist and imagine all the space i'd have!

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  2. Maybe we should trade spaces, J. i live in a four-bedroom house - not a mansion, by any means, but with kids leaving the nest, i find myself feeling annoyed with how much extra stuff i am caretaker for - stuff i don't use and don't need, rooms that appear to be for storage only now. i sometimes fantasize about a fire sweeping through and taking all - of course, all inhabitants would be safely out, and i'd somehow rescue all of my pictures and important papers! (no offense intended to anyone who's actually experienced a house fire - i know that's not really what i want.) *slap* to myself for not being able to get rid of things.

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  3. I'm with Atreau on the minimalist dream ... but I seem to attract clutter. I love looking at the WestElm catalog (there's a website, too) with its square corners filled with nothing. The occasional sculptural lamp. Nothing further than eight inches off the floor. But who lives like that? Where would I keep the bubble wrap? xoxoxo mireille

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  5. Space is the greatest luxury in a mammoth city, so true.

    I would like to take the opportunity to slap my landlord (who's an artist, for god's sake) for painting our walls in colors that are slight variations on the "Bad Girls" decor theme. No amount of pictures can distract from the ghastly taupey-greeny-beiges of this place.

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  6. BTW - your profile is pricelessly funny.

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  7. Oh J! I hope your flat starts being nice to you. It is always so expensive in large cities like London. Tell me about Notting Hill - I bet you are glad to be out of there! ;) London is just too expensive. What about a quick trip to TK Maxx to cheer up?

    xoxo

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  8. Campaspe, one of the best things about owning a property is the freedom to choose one's own hideous wallpaper or colour combinations. LOL! (And thanks!)

    D, you know what happened between me and Notting Hill Gate. Please do not twist the knife in the wound. ;-) Went to TKM yesterday: it always cheers me up.

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  9. J did not mean to upset you - I meant I do understand about N Hill - we sold our flat in Holland Park in 1999.

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  10. Oh, N, I was kidding. (Btw, sorry I called you by the wrong initial.) Still, you sold your flat *after* the boom; I did it *before*, in May 1995. My flat went from £60,000 to £195,000 in less than a year, and then went up and up and up even more.

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  11. Hey J, this post was throwing me back to the first times we met, was it in 63 or 64?
    A special slap to both of us for not being able to meet once in less the 10 years

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  12. Actually, Elan, the first time I saw you was in 1960. I was 12 and you were this little tiny skinny shrimp clutching a corner of his mummy's dress and playing peek-a-boo with me behind her back. You were so cute! You still are. LOL!

    So when are you coming over, then? ;-)

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